Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Induhviduals are great (for a laugh)

I think the Dilbert comic strip is brilliant. I'm not sure what that says about me. But there are SO many times I feel Scott Adams has bugged my office because it is right on the mark. I have worked for the pointy haired boss - several times!

I got the Dilbert newsletter the other day and the True Tales of Induhviduals made me laugh. Extract here:

TRUE TALES OF INDUHVIDUALS
Here are some true tales of people who put the duh in induhvidual.

I'm in the U.S. Virgin Islands (where they drive on the left side of the road) traveling on a small, open bus. One of the people in front of me remarks that the word "POLICE" is spelled backwards on the hood of the police car. After a lengthy discussion, they conclude that it's because they drive on the left side of the road.

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I was getting gas at the pump when an elderly lady and her grandson drove up next to me in her car. Her grandson hopped out to pump the gas for her, and noticed that the pump was on the left side of the car, but the gas door was on the right. When he told her, she started the car back up, made a U-turn, and drove to the OTHER side of the pump, leaving her in the same situation she started with. When her grandson told her this, she started yelling at him, saying, "You said it was on the wrong side LAST time! Make up your mind!"

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A friend moved to Albuquerque and his wife kept complaining about finding her way around the town. He told her to spot the Sandia Mountains and she'd know that would be east. She said, "That's fine, but where are the other directions?"

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So my wife is trying to fax something to the Virginia Dept of Employment regarding an unemployment claim by a previous employee. She tries the fax over and over again, day and night. No luck. She calls to check to see if the fax number is wrong. The woman at the Dept of Employment who answered the phone asks "Is there paper in your fax? Our fax will not answer unless there is paper in your fax?" My wife questions her on that, and the woman insists that their fax "knows" if there is paper in the other fax. Needless to say, that was not the problem.

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While trying to buy two bottles of wine in a supermarket I was asked, "Are you 21?" Trying to be funny, I said, "No, but my daughter is 22."

The checkout clerk replied "I'm not interested in how old your daughter is. Are you over 21?"